Okay, well here it is. The reason this series of stories was called “Will you do me a favor?” So, I was talking about working as a long distance operator and how we used to get some unusual customers.

Well, one night I was working the late shift – probably 11pm-7am or something like that and I got a call from this dude that would occasionally call, always from a payphone and ask us to do him a favor. The funny thing about this guy was that he would whisper “Will you do me a favor?” and we would always say no. That night I was feeling pretty funny so I figured I would see what it is that he wanted. Here’s the exchange that followed as best I can remember it:

[b]Weird Guy:[/b] Will you do me a favor?
[b]Don:[/b] Sure, what can I do for you?
[b]WG:[/b] You’ll help me?
[b]Don:[/b] Yeah, what do you want me to do?
[b]WG:[/b] Okay, is there a girl near you?
[b]Don:[/b] Uh, yeah.
[b]WG:[/b] Is she pretty?
[b]Don:[/b] Yeah, she’s attractive.
[b]WG:[/b] Okay. Go over to her.
[b]Don:[/b] (still sitting in his seat) Okay, I am walking over to her.
[b]WG:[/b] Is she there?
[b]Don:[/b] Yeah, she’s right in front of me.
[b]WG:[/b] Okay, take her shirt off (at this point Weird Guy’s voice is really beginning to betray his mental instability!)
[b]Don:[/b] Okay, her shirt’s off. Now what?
[b]WG:[/b] (breathing is getting heavy) Now rub your hands up and down her.
[b]Don:[/b] You got it (I can’t imagine the kind of guy who would really think that I was doing this at work!).
[b]WG:[/b] Now…uh…take her pants off…uh…uuuh
[b]Don:[/b] No, I can’t do that (completely breaking the illusion).
[b]WG:[/b] What? You have to! You said you would help me.
[b]Don:[/b] I can’t do that here! I’ll get fired!
[b]WG:[/b] (sounding very over-the-edge)P…Please! Please. I will give you a million dollars! Please. I will give you a million dollars!
[b]Don:[/b] Okay, but we’re going to be here for a long time. Please deposit the first $3 in coins now.
[b]WG:[/b] (click….)

The funny thing about this to me is picturing this guy in a phone booth somewhere with his pants around his knees, severely abusing his member with one hand and digging for change with the other!

Well, there you have it. Probably a little anticlimactic (no pun intended) but I hope it was worth the wait.